Remembering Tom Roush

I’m dedicating this post to Tom Roush – a hell of a story teller, a funny geek, a smart DBA, a gentle soul, my dearest friend, #SQLFamily.

Make a donation to Tom Roush Memorial Fund here.

One Saturday morning in Portland, I had the privilege to bump into a gentle soul named Tom. We introduced ourselves and he probably recognized my “odd” accent. We talked almost about anything, from SQL, Germany + waffles, planes to cookie jars – in fact we both missed a few SQL Saturday Oregon sessions. That’s what #SQLFamily does; we meet new people, build friendship – heck, a family – in this kind of SQL events.

I learned so much from Tom, since the day I met him in 2012. From what eye-catching memorable photography meant, what made captivating stories and all the way to grabbing, squeezing, running, chasing and living life fully. I learned most from him what it meant to live fully, because he was a man who was full of life and love.

SQL Saturday Oregon 2014 with Grant Fritchey, Mickey Stuewe, Julie Koesmarno and Tom Roush. Photo credit: Mickey Stuewe

When you meet good – I mean really good – people, you hold them tight, you remember them and you don’t take them for granted. Because you’d never know when you would ever hear or see for the last time, a gentle soulful man like Tom would ever smile back at you, and calling you “bu…” so lovingly and thoughtfully as he knew you could do something better, and deserve to fight for living life fully.

The last thing he taught me was “letting go”. It was challenging and it was ironic too. After you grabbed, squeezed, ran, chased a thing that was so precious, how could you let go? Live and Love.

Today, I’m letting go with a heart-felt gratitude to Tom for his friendship and his warmth.

I will always remember a touching story he once told me about the Second Tuesday of August

I encourage you to read it, if not, drop everything you do now – give that hug to your mum, your husband, your children, your sister, your brother, your dearest friend. Go live life fully and treasure it, like Tom did.


Rest in peace Tom and one final big hug from me, your “butt-head” friend.




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